Abusive Relationship by Gudrun Smith

Abusive Relationship by Gudrun Smith Personal Development

It is not easy to amid to be in an abusive relationship and special hard to leave that relationship. Most people who never experience it don't understand it and they will even give the wrong advice.

It is not always easy from the outside to see which partner are true to you and really loves you, or that they manipulate you so they can control you. There are many reasons behind the mind of an abuser. Most of the time it comes from their childhood or they are total failure and now they want to be in control of their spouse. The control can be afraid that when they don't keep their spouse under control they may run off with another partner. They hated how their parents done it and never will allow that their partner even try to go that direction, or they need someone to let off steam and to blame them for their mistakes.

Really to say we don't really know what goes on in their mind. This is happen in all level of society and they are really good to cover it up and to manipulate situation. But all abuser have the same pattern, they first build the honeymoon stage by been very attracted to the other partner, and than they build up the tension until the explosion comes. That when see a real physical abuser. Afterwards they feel sorry, they ask their victims for forgiveness and they explain that they never wanted to hurt them, but they just push the wrong bottom and they lost control. That they feel so sorry and they ask you to help them not to do this any more and that you need to change and have to understand the stress and trouble they are in at the job.

Again they are making their spouse believing them and to look inside themselves for the problem and what they done wrong so the other had no choice then to act like that or that they act like that to get them out off their trance they just was in. This manipulation put the seed into the victim mind start to believe that it was their fault and before they know it they lost all their self-confidence and self-esteem. They become afraid to make decision by himself or herself, or even small stuff like what to cook for dinner or what they can do or not.

A victim will cover up their spouse misbehave and they believe that they are just going through a tough time, but pretty soon they will be happy again as they were before. They become depended on their spouse and the abuser may really love their partner, but they have a major issue with themselves. They have two faces, one on the outside been a great guy and very caring and the other behind close doors when they abuse their spouse. They play to been a victim and had a hart time in live and now the other person feels sorry and wants to help them and make it up for them. Their victim believes that they found their big and now they will help their spouse to be happy with them and that they hope to take the pain away from them and be really happy.

Most victims are so manipulated that they never will find the way out off this relationship while a few are able to get out. Who ever went through something like this has deep scars and it is not seldom that they isolate them from others just to avoid to be hurt again.

When that victim learns why it happens and what all the first flags were they ignore and why they ignored it, it never will happen again. In the same time when the person don't learn from their mistakes, they are most likely to get into another abused relationship or even return back to their ex's. Some even just cover it up with alcohol or drugs abuse.

The true is, when an abuser doesn't see it as their fault and get help so they can change, stay will always be an abuser and nobody from the outside can take it from them.

There are always red flags and your guts will warn you, but your ego will confuse you. Your ego will put fear in you, that you may never find another person who will love you and this is just the price you must pay and in reality it is not so bad, and yes you deserved it, he just didn't want you become in insaint.

No one has to live in that situation, and live is too long to suffer, but too short not to enjoin it the way you should. Get help and change your help. You need help and we can help to build a stronger and better life you ever dream about.

Are you ready to make changes in your life?

Than join my free training every Wednesday. At 5pm PST or 7pm CST.

All you have to do sign up here and come in.

Gudrun Smith
Personal and Business Development
210-279-4317
Skype: gudrunsmith
http://gudrunsmith.com
http://momshomebasedbiz.com